


A True Brother: The Prologue-Starlights

by TheConcernedF0X



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: AU, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2019-10-11 13:56:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17448287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheConcernedF0X/pseuds/TheConcernedF0X
Summary: This story will have the same start plot as the movie with minor and major alterations. One major alteration is Nick has an older brother. Jameson has been gone for a long time and hasn't seen his brother or mother in over a decade. But he has returned, and with more baggage than he left with. But he is determined to reconnect with them and protect them at any cost, because they're all he has left.Jameson goes back to his first apartment that happens to be two doors down from Judy's and gets there as her first day ends. This sparks a journey he would never have expected, repairing his relationship with his brother, and helping him in many ways, including matters of love.This story will go past the movies plot as WildeHopps live thier life and he tries to repair his.After much thought I decided that this story needed massive tweaking, so I decided to clean slate it. For those of you that have read there will be massive changes, for those that haven't read and enjoy.Biggest change there will be a prologue now, split into two parts, Jameson is the focus.





	1. Prologue Part One: Fire and Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jameson Wilde is voiced by Chris Pine.
> 
> REVIEW.

Prologue Part One: Fire and Blood

( _Present day, Zootopia_ )

Jameson Wilde pulled his 2016 Dodge Challenger into his parking space across the street from his apartment building. This was his first of two apartments in the city, his second one was a luxury apartment in Sahara Square, this one...definitely wasn't a luxury apartment complex. But, it was his first ever apartment and much better located for traveling to work being located on the edge of Downtown, it was also much closer to where his mother lived, and for sentimentality purposes.

He hadn't been to this apartment in about a year, not since he first came back to the city. He had been living in the lux apartment gathering his courage up and trying to keep a promise he made. But it was high past time he did in his mind, his conscience was constantly reminding him how many days were passing with him doing nothing.

He looked up at the Grand Pangolin Arms before leaning back into his seat and letting out a sigh. It had been a long day, work was busy, he had to pack his things back at the lux apartment, and then he had to go shopping. What made the day worse for him was he hadn't had a single cup of coffee all damn day, and he was definitely feeling it. Sighing he rubbed and ran his fingers through the top of his head with his left paw ruffling the longer fur there and then dropped his paw to his lap. Leaning his head back onto the headrest he let his eyes slip shut for just a moment...a moment was enough.

_A raging inferno flew across Jameson's subconscious leaving ash and smoke suspended in black before him. Flames roared and raged out of view before his vision cleared._

_(Three years ago, Edge of Bunnyburrow by border to Cadbury)_

Jameson was about a mile away from his farm traveling through the grove of trees that hid his farm from the main road and doing his best to avoid the many divots and potholes on the dirt and gravel road, the suspension on his old F100 couldn't take it. He missed his last truck, he had put 30,000 in it to personalize it and make it better, including the suspension. But he lost that truck to a terrible car accident two years ago, the same accident that crippled his left leg. He would need to walk with a cane but an advanced prosthetic designing company came up with a thin mechanical brace for him allowing to put use his left leg fully and walk with only a slight limp.

He originally wasn't even been supposed to be gone today, it was a Saturday, and Saturday's were a family day. But he had been called into work, as a CIA analyst and strategist he was on call whenever a team or agent needed his skills. It had been this way for the past eight years. Although, they knew that Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays were his family days and everyone in the CIA that would need him tried not to call him in on those days. They knew those days were incredibly important to him, and as a result only very rarely called him in on those days. But a team's time table had moved up way quicker than anticipated and they were relying heavily on Jameson's abilities to decipher patterns and strategize very quickly and efficiently. So they had no choice but to call him in, and while Jameson knew there was no helping the matter he still was heavily irritated by it, so he climbed in his truck and drove the half hour to the small CIA installation in Cadbury.

The leader had even apologized personally over the com connection when Jameson had connected in. He had told her it was fine and set to work, getting the plan together very quickly as he was eager to get back home. Then he set to deciphering the targets patterns to map proper movements and stayed on advising the team as necessary. The mission with his expertise ended up taking two hours, he signed off quickly and jogged to his truck eager to get back home.

25 minutes later he was keeping his eyes on the dirt road home and he did not bother to focus on anything else because one bad hit and an axel or spring could snap. He really needed to pay to have this road paved and restore the truck. He only let his focus expand when he was a half mile from home and broke through the grove of trees. His heart quickly became filled with horror and dread when he caught sight of the huge plume of smoke rising from where his home was located behind a hill with a massive oak sitting on top.

"No...Sarah! Rachel!"

Slamming his foot on the gas he floored the truck, gunning it towards his home; and more importantly, his wife and daughter. The frame of the truck rocked and bucked as he slammed into potholes but luckily the suspension held. He peeled around the bend kicking out large amounts of gravel and dust behind him bringing into view his modest farm house...and the raging inferno that was consuming it.

Dread and horror consumed him. "noo."

He still had a quarter mile until he reached the house. As he roared towards it he frantically looked towards the front hoping to see his two brown does comforting each other while surrounded by the three mammal protection detail that was present whenever he was not home...He saw neither.

"Maybe they're in the back, yeah, that has to be it. Please let it be it."

Slamming on the breaks he brought the truck to a screeching halt just a few meters shy of the low stone wall that surrounded the home. Taking off his hat he threw it in the passenger seat before un-holstering his revolver and quickly clambering out of the truck. The second his feet with heels arched always touched the ground he shot off towards his home.

"SARAH! RACHEL!"

He covered ground quickly but he had no idea what was coming. As he went past the low stone wall he felt a searing pain in his right shoulder blade rising to his shoulder as a blade cut across it. yelling out in surprise and pain the hit caused him to stumble and trip, his revolver flying from his grip in the process. Hitting the ground and sliding he used the momentum to roll and turn around to face his attacker. He tried not to think about the fact that if he was being attacked now then the fire wasn't an accident, he tried to shove down the dread.

Once he was facing the attacker he quickly noticed three things. One, it was attackers plural, there were five of them advancing towards him, two rams and three bunnies, all male and wielding machetes except for one who was also wielding a blood covered hatchet, obviously the weapon that cut across his shoulder blade. The second was he knew exactly who the five were. The third is he saw two of the three mammal protection detail set against the wall dead with multiple hacks and slashes to their bodies, the third member which also happened to be the leader of the detail was nowhere in sight.

The dread that was consuming him got put on the back-burner as rage consumed him. He ripped an audible snarl from his muzzle as he stood, blood flowing down his back freely and dripping down his legs. He opened and closed his fists in anger and anticipation, rolling his shoulders to loosen them and grunting as it irritated the fresh wound. Fury in his eyes and dread in his heart he growled out "I should have killed you all when I had the chance all those years ago."

The bunny wielding the machete and hatchet stepped forward from the group of five and gave him a sinister smile. his voice was deep and raspy when he spoke, "Yes you should have you filthy pelt, you should have...Look at you haha, Domesticated. A bunny girls little pet heheheha. ( _Jameson snarls deeper._ ) I had hoped you would come home in time to see this, we made sure they couldn't call you or anyone, and when we arrived they fled into the home and locked it. We wanted to leave you a spectacle like those two ( _He points his machete at the two dead wolf guards_ ), but alas they never came outside."

Horror griped Jameson's heart fully " _nononono NO_!"

"A shame really. They've been in there awhile and we haven't heard a single scream. We saw them in a top window looking out about ten minutes ago too but still no screams. Her and that little bitch of a daughter that my brother should have ripped from her stomach when he had the chance. ( _The snarl tripled in fury and intensity causing a ram and a bunny to take a few steps back_ ). Oh that's right you adopted the little bitch as your own didn't you?"

"heheha such a shame they did not come out or burn to death, I would have enjoyed hearing their screams. They should be long dead by now, and I suppose you should take comfort in the fact that we couldn't touch them. We would have ravaged them both throughly before hacking them to little tiny pieces for you to pick up. Do you think the smoke got them first? Or the lack of oxygen? Either way you take comfort in the fact that whichever killed them first did and not the inferno thats burning away everything you built. And you should take comfort that you'll be joining them in death soon."

Jameson's rage and fury was at its peak, and so was his despair. He had tried his hardest to hold them in but the tears fell.

"ooooohhhhh there they are. The tears! Thats what I wanted to see! The mighty Scythe bursting into tears at the realization that his two little bunnies are gone, bodies by now well burned to a crisp! Haha thats what I got up this morning for! To see the worthless pelt once feared by so many criminals reduced to tears because he will never get to see his wife and daughter again!"

At that the bunny started laughing manically and the rest joined in. They didn't take him as a threat in his state both at being 'domesticated' and being distraught, not to mention without a weapon... But he was just as dangerous. Jameson's pained and angered snarl reached its crescendo and he shook his head violently to dispel the tears and clear his vision. His fists closed and tightened, his shoulders squared, he didn't even feel the wound on his back anymore. The group of five were laughing like he wasn't even there, like they hadn't just committed atrocities.

When he spoke next it was gravelly and dark. "no."

The two that had stepped back stopped laughing.

"No."

The other ram and another bunny shut their jaws.

He sounded like a demon when he roared for the last time "NOOO!"

The rest shut their mouths and all but the leader took a step back.

Jameson rolled backwards, half turned, and pulled a farmer's scythe from an old stump that sat in the front of the property just to the left of the dirt road. It was a decoration piece that was always there as a nod to his past, but it was razor sharp.

The five readied their weapons and started to circle around him. Jameson let out a yell and rushed forward scythe ready. In front of him was the leader flanked by bunnies two and three on the left and ram one on his right. As he rushed forward bunnies two and three stepped in front of the leader and bunny three swung first. Jameson blocked and deflected the blow with the shaft of the scythe and shoved him back with it. Before bunny two could do anything Jameson cleaved him vertically in half with an underpawed slice.

The leader of the group advanced towards him next and Jameson built on the momentum of the swing that cut bunny two in half to switch his grip and bring the scythe in an arc back around and swung an overpawed slice. Bunny one just barely dodged backwards in time causing the scythe blade to slam into the earth, rather than wasting time knowing bunnies one and three were still coming at him he abandoned the scythe and dashed forward to meet bunny one. Bunny one swung both weapons at him in vertical slices but Jameson pushed into the space limiting the force of the swing.

Jameson then caught both wrists in his hands and rammed his shoulder into the leader knocking him back while simultaneously using the momentum to disarm him of the hatchet in his right paw. As the hatchet was wrenched from his grip Jameson caught it in mid air, twirled it, twisted it, and hurled it towards ram one.

Ram one had been hesitant to rush in, waiting for a moment to rush forward and strike. He thought he had found it when Jameson was grappling with his leader. Rushing forward his momentum was stopped by the thrown hatchet burying itself in his throat literally stopping him dead in his tracks. The hit froze the ram's momentum and he tripped forward, driving the hatchet deeper and shooting out a gush of blood.

Jameson paid no mind after he threw because he knew it was a kill shot so he kept his focus on the leader. With his free right paw he slammed his fist into bunny one's face before shifting his position by turning outwards. Back now to the leader he slammed his elbow into bunny one's gut and again used the momentum to disarm him, this time of his machete. While he was doing this he saw bunny three rushing towards him close and ready to strike. Bunny one's machete now in paw he ducked under the blow from bunny three and twirled around counter-clockwise, switching his grip mid twirl to underpawed and severed bunny one's left leg from body with such force bunny one flew into the ground with a blood curdling scream.

As he came back up though, he realized he made a mistake. Bunny three had recovered from their over swing faster than he anticipated. Normally he would have already predicted how this entire battle was going to pan out, seen all the possible moves that were going to be made. He was sort of a much lesser version of Sherlock Holmes in his talent of deciphering mammals patterns and skills of deduction. They were gifts that had shown up when he was four and had been there ever since, until today. His mind was muddled with immense grief, sadness, rage, and despair. He couldn't think straight, he couldn't see the moves planned out in his mind, and he was about to pay for it.

Bunny three was swinging their machete towards him, and there was no way he could block the blow or deflect it away from his body. It was either deflect the hit to a lesser area like his hip, or die. Raising his commandeered machete he deflected the bunnies' blade down and to the left...and right into his left hip. The blade dug into the bone and Jameson let out a yell of agony, the bunny sneered at him in triumph, but it was short lived.

Before the bunny could withdraw its blade from his hip Jameson grabbed the wrist holding it firmly and before the bunny could react he took his own machete and with a brutal chop severed head from body. The bunny's body immediately crashed to the ground and Jameson released the bunny's wrist, letting fall to the ground as well. He left the machete in his hip as he had no time to remove it. He had figured there was a mammal in the back to make sure his wife and daughter didn't try and escape that way and he was right. A third ram was coming right at him appearing out of the smoke wielding an axe.

With no time to do anything else he threw his machete still in paw like a spear at the ram. The ram was so close and the machete coming at it so fast there was nothing the ram could do and the machete buried itself in the rams chest, the blade exploding out of its back. It killed the ram instantly and the body tripped and rolled a few feet before stilling.

Jameson did not have a moment to spare because the last mammal standing, ram two, was coming right at him from behind. Now weaponless Jameson had no choice but to yank the machete embedded in his hip out and turn to face the last threat. Sadly for him he had mistimed again and the rams machete was coming in a downwards stroke at his head. Making a split second decision to save his life he deflected the blade to the left causing it to get embedded in the middle of his left shoulder and shattering the collar bone.

Jameson screamed out in pure agony and the force of the blow sent him to one knee. Fighting through the agonizing pain and his swimming vision Jameson shoved the machete he still had in paw through the rams gut causing it to grunt out in surprise and stumble back. Jameson then stood and pulled the rams machete out of his shoulder and then swung it in an arc taking the rams head, a surprised and terrified look frozen on it's face as it fell.

Blood was pouring from his wounds and his shirt was ruined and weighed down from the blood. Jameson fell to his knees deeply heaving in oxygen and panting heavily, his whole body shaking from the pain. Tears were falling down his muzzle and onto the dirt road, mostly from grief than pain. The entire time he was fighting those who remained their leader now missing his left leg had been crawling away from the fight and toward Jameson's truck leaving a trail of blood in his wake. But he wasn't going anywhere, not on Jameson's watch, and he had stopped when he saw his last lackey fall. He mustered all the rage he had left for what was going to happen next.

Dropping the machete for a moment Jameson gripped the front of what was left of his shirt and ripped it off, exposing his back to the leader. The leader's horror grew tenfold when he saw the sinister black fur dyed tattoo of a scythe on Jameson's back with black tendrils sprouting from the sides of his back expanding and thinning until they touch the scythe's shaft, three on each side. The way the blood was pouring from the wound in his shoulder made the scythe blade look like it was coated with and dripping blood.

Jameson without looking took the machete back in paw and slowly stood, the blade grinding against the dirt as he did. He looked over his right shoulder at the leader and said in a cold voice "you said you wanted a spectacle right? I'll give you one."

At that he turned and hobbled over to the leader, the leader opened his mouth to say something but it was cut off by a machete chop to the mouth. Jameson poured all of his rage out then and spent the next minute rapidly hacking at the leader every which way. 30 hacks later Jameson's rage was gone and his energy spent. He let go of the machete and left it in what was left of the leaders head and turned, and then began stumbling towards his home.

Jameson's vision was blurred and swimming but he still pressed on. As he got closer to the house Jameson tripped in front of a pile of burning debris that fell from it. Even though he was only in that spot for a few moments on his paws and knees a decent pool of blood had formed. Jameson knew that if he didn't do something to staunch the bleeding coming from his shoulder he would bleed out soon. Looking at the pile of flaming debris Jameson reached in and pulled out a piece of heated metal. Taking several deep breathes he then shoved it into the wound cauterizing it and letting out a long scream of agony.

Once the wound was done being cauterized he tossed the piece of metal away and groaned in agony. His vision was now swimming worse than before and lined with deep red. Standing as best he could he began stumbling towards him home again screaming out, "SAAAARRRAAAHH! RRRRAAACCCHEEL!"

Once Jameson was just a few meters from the home his body couldn't take it anymore. He collapsed forward and fell onto the ground with a thud kicking up dust. He tried to crawl forward weakly calling out his famille's names again. "Sarah! Rachel!"

He managed to crawl maybe another half meter before his body fully gave out and he crumpled to the ground, his vision almost fully rimmed red. He reached his right paw out towards the home and with his last bit of effort croaked out "Saraaah..Racheell."

His paw then fell to the dirt, his vision fully became red, and he fell unconscious.

 

 

 

Jameson Wilde and Sarah Jumps-Wilde.  Dec. 7, 2013


	2. Starlights Under the Oak Tree Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry that this chapter is not complete up I needed you the readers to see that this story is being re-done. Feel free to comment.

Prologue Part Two: Starlights Under the Oak Tree

_A raging inferno flew across Jameson's subconscious leaving ash and smoke suspended in black before him. Then his vision cleared and rapid, erratic flashes of the enire battle flew across his vision. Screaming, blood, tears, clanging of steel, fire. An inferno flew across his subconscious once more before clearing and revealing his farmhouse consumed in flames._

_(BunnyBurrow General, One week later)_

Jameson awoke with a gasp. His head was swimming, vision was blurred, senses dulled, he felt like he was on fire, everything hurt, and he had no clue where he was or what had happened. He laid whereever he was, confused and in pain, just waiting for his senses to return to him...and maybe stop hurting so damn much if it wasn't to much trouble.

The first senses that returned to him was touch and hearing. He first registered the beeping of a heart monitor and the feel of an oxygen mask on his muzzle, that told him he was in a hosptial...again. He breifly wondered what had happened to him this time, last thing he remebered was driving home...maybe he had gotten into another bad car accident? His vision was still blurry at best and he couldn't smell really, so he didn't know if his wife and dauther were in the room, he assumed they were of course, if not in the room somewhere in the hospital. He smiled a little thinking about them, but still knowing he probably was worrying and stressing them out again being in the hospital for the second time this year. The first had been eight months ago when their water heater had exploded, peppering him with shrapnel, nothing major besides damaging his left eye and leaving a jagged scar running down the right side of his muzzle. That and the scalding hot water that hit him, he still couldn't take hot showers anymore because of that.

After what he gauged as five minutes went by his vision cleared up enough for him to see the room he was in, it was a standard hospital room and his wife and daughter were nowhere to be seen. He mentally shurgged, there was no doubt they were here in the hospital somewhere. After about another minute of staring at the white ceiling he dedided he might as well examine the extent of his injuries and figure out why he was hurting so damn much, especially his chest, it felt like he had been stepped on by an elephant. Leaning up as much as he could manage, which was very very little, he looked down his body to assess his injuries.

Noticing the blanket covering his torso his grabbed it in his right paw and pulled it to the side exposong his bare chest, the first thing he noticed was his left arm was imbolized in the way that told him his collar bone was broken. " _Okay so far left broken collar bone, thats not to bad_." He then noticed a big slightly bloody bandage covering his entire shoulder and down to just a few inches above his left pectoral. " _Hmm, okay..thats a little odd, maybe the truck rolled and some of the tools I had in the back came forward and nailed me. Yeah, with my luck thats probably what happened, I think I had a saw back there..won't know for sure until I ask. Best to move on and find out why my chest hurts so much."_

Looking down some more to see his chest more clearly and seeing no bandages he then began to tentatively feel his ribs for bruising or breaks. He became confused very quickly when besides minor brusing on the skin, nothing was there. Thinking maybe he wasn't pressing hard enough to check he began to prod the left side of his chest, thats where the pain was, but again, nothing. Moving on to feel the left side of his rib cage he flinched when his right shoulder balde flared in pain and he felt a pulling sensation. " _Okay, stiches on my back, right shoulder blade and up to my shoulder, weird angles too. What the hell is going on? Theres no way I could have gotten an injury there in a car accident...And why the fuck does my godsdamn chest hurt so much!?...or is it my heart!? Whats happened to me!?"_

At that exact moment he heard the door to his room opened and he heard a mammal pad into the room. He didn't want to risk calling out, his throat felt like a desert, and he couldn't scent to see if it was his wife or daughter still, especially with the oxygen mask on, so he had no choice but to wait. He heard whoever it was approach and use the step to be level with his bed, he layed his head back on the pillow and looked to his left. The first thing that appeared was a set of brown bunny ears, his ears perked and his tail thumped against the hospital bed once, thinking it was his wife Sarah.

His tail would have thumped more, but quickly follwed by the ears was their owner, a brown bunny doe nurse with brown eyes, definitely not his beautiful blue eyed bunny doe. The nurse reached the top of the little stairs, now level with his hospital bed. She hadn't noticed he was awake and looking at her expectantly, she was to budy staring down at a clipboard to notice. He assumed it contained his information as she started checking his vitals, he wanted to make some sort of noise but his throat felt like agony, so he had to wait for her to notice him.

As she was checking all the vitals she started humming and talking softly to herself.

"Poor fox, been put through the ringer last two years. *chuckles* If you were awake you'd probably recognize you are in the same room as the last two times. You know I may be new but your pretty well known around here, a sort of hot topic. lets see, (she flips to the very back of the clipboard), First visit, car accident: brought in critical condition, massive damage to left leg, here in the hospital for four months, in a coma for three weeks non medically induced. side effects from accident include needing a cane or some form of brace to use that leg and...urge to walk on all fours or at least with heels arched? Whats that about? I'll have to ask around, no way I'm asking you."

" _Reading my history I see, outloud. Great, I have to hear some of my worst moments, and I can't even add commentary."_

"Ok, second visit, Water Heater Explosion? Sweet Serenity!: Brought in bad condition, upper right side of muzzle sliced bad, shrapnel embedded in right cheek below eye. Left eyelid hit by small shrapnel, tore in the middle all the way up by it, embedded in his left orbital, still there. Eyes ability to hold color lost, causing the eye to take the apperance of being blind, movement and sight still there. Shrapnel peppering torso and arms, no major damage caused. Entire body hit with scalding water, side effect no hot water bathing."

*pages flipping* "Ok notes: No restraints, period, prone to agressive panicking when waking up restrained. No hot bathing. Must be assited when walking or given cane. Incredibly stubborn, *snorts* wow thats in his offical notes, when it comes to his well being and being able to perform certain actions after injury, wife keeps him in line. *laughs lightly* wow his doctor really put that in his offical medical dossier."

*pages flipping* " Ok now to run down the list. Heart is good, hmmhmmhmm, oh his IV bag for pain meds is out so that needs replacing.."

 _"...Well that explains my agony_."

"Hmhmhmmm, Looks like the rest of his fluids are alright...Oh according to the charts the oxygen mask can come off today, good for you sleepy head. Hmmhmmhmhmm, hmmm you were brought out of your medical coma a few days ago, so you should be waking up any day now..."

" _I was put in a medically induced coma? Gods I hope I haven't been out for too long. Last time I was I freaked Sarah out something fierce, Rachel worse. I promised her I would never put her through that again, this nurse needs to spot me NOW. I need to see how long I was out and see my daughter, let her know daddy's fine."_


	3. Chapter 2.1 The Realization of Loss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am soooo sorry for the wait. I have neglected posting on this site so much and I am sorry for it. I keep up on Fanfiction but I constantly forget to post the chapters here. Forgive me.

 Checks complete the bunny nurse went to check on him.  "Ok sleepy head, lets check on those bandages."

At that the nurse set the clip board down on a little side table and finally looked at him. She froze when she registered the fact that Jameson was staring right at her, his eyebrows slightly raised in question. After a few moments of nothing happening he tried smiling. That snapped her out of it, just not exactly the way he expected.

"Gah!" The bunny nurse leaped back, and right off the little platform striaght to the floor, letting out a little yell of surprise as she fell.

Jameson leaned up in shock and not being able to speak let out a grunt of concern. The nurse let out a few curses before calling out "I'm okay!" she then hopped back onto the little platform with an embaressed look upon her face. "sorry, sorry. Just didn't expect you to be awake and looking right at me...have you..been awake long?"

Jameson nods. "Oh, you heard everything I said didn't you?"

Again Jameson nods. "Well thats embarrassing, but oh! Im such a bad nurse! you,ve been awake probably in agony waiting for me to notice you! oh I am so so sorry!"

Jameson, though with worries of his own tried to reassure her it was fine but it came out as another grunt and some dry coughs. "Oh, I'm sorry! You must be parched hold on!"

At that she hopped of the platform and ran into the bathroom attached to his room. He heard the sink turn on and off then a moment later she returned with a small cup full of water with a bendy straw in it. She walked up the stairs and onto the bed, leaning over she said "here let's get this oxygen mask off you."

Removing the mask she brought the straw to his lips and said "small sips only, pause every third, repeat until this cup is empty."

Jameson nodded and began to drink. " _Oh sweet heaven cold tap water straight from the gods."_

After a few minutes the cup was empty and Jameson's throat no longer felt like Sahara Sqaure. The nurse set the cup asisde and Jameson cleared his throat a few times before attempting to speak, when he did his voice was hoarse.

"Agh, thank you..Ms. Hopps. Now I don't want to seem rude, but you mentioned my IV bag for pain meds is empty, and right now i'm definitly feeling it."

"oh oh oh! Yes! Right! Sorry!"

At that she hopped off the bed again and went to the medical cart situated on his right and he heard here rummage through it before calling out "Ah ha! found it!"

She then came back around, walked up the steps, and used the little platform to pad over to the IV stand. After a few moments she had the bag replaced and the meds were flowing down the tube and into his body. The relief was pretty instant, numbing the pain, except the pain in his chest, it was quite bothersome. " _Oooohhhh that feels better...except my FREAKING CHEST! Sweet karma what the hell is wrong!? ugh...matter for later, right now I need to figure how long I've been out and see my daughter, and my wife."_

The nurse Ms. Hopps was making a few notes on the clipboard that contained his info so he got her attention, his voice a little less hoarse. "Exucse me Ms. Hopps?"

Ms. Hopps looked up at him from the clipboard and quickly said "please Mr. Wilde, call me Anna or Nurse Anna. So did you have a question?"

"Ah alright, then you can call me Jameson, and yes I do. You said I was put in a medically induced coma, how long have I been out?"

"Hmm, thats fair Jameson. To answer your question, you've been out for a week today."

" _A week!? Shit! That's not as bad as last time but my starlights are still probably worried sick._ "

"A week? damn it. I promised my Little Starlight I wouldn't scare her like this again, my Northern Starlight too. Where are they by any chance? could you go get them?"

Jameson, to occupied thinking of seeing his wife and daughter, missed the look of concerm filt across her face. So he continued on.

"Oh! You probably need more to go on than that. My Starlights are my wife and daughter, though you knew I had a wife already by my medical notes. Thier names are Sarah and Rachel. One thing you may not know since you mentioned your're new, is... they're bunnies. They're a shade of brown darker than you, beautiful blue eyes the both of them. Of course i'm sure calling out Mrs. Wilde would suffice. So could you bring them in? I know you're supposed to go get my doctor first and tell me what happened this time and yadda yadda yadda, but I just really really want to see my family."

Normally, Jameson would not let it slip that he was married to a bunny. The reason being interspecies realtionships are especially taboo and frowned upon, but love is love to him, the rest be damned. In fact very few knew of his and Sarah's more intimate realtionship, they went under the guise that he was the leader of the protection detail and lived on the farm as 24/7 protection. Unless of course he had work elsewhere and then he would relinquish control over to the three mammal protection detail. That is what most believed as the truth, the farm was quite isolated from prying eyes so mammals never saw how he interacted with the two does, and figured out he was more than a permanant bodyguard. Of course mammals judged anyways that she hired a shifty fox to protect her 24/7 and live on her property but that was easier to ignore than if they found out she was married to the shifty fox.

He let it slip now though because it was common knowledge at the hostpial. Between his two visits, one in critical condition, it was hard not to keep it secret, they were his registered next of kin. But to still keep it quiet, the whole staff, even the janitors, had to sign CIA confidentiality agreements stating that they couldn't say a word because it endangered the lives of the two does who were under CIA protection. They were free to judge in their own head and gossip amongst themselves but that was it, and it suited him and his family just fine.

Speaking of which, Nurse Anna hadn't moved since he had mentioned his wife and daughter were bunnies. "Nurse Anna. Could you please go and fetch my wife and daughter and bring them in? I want to see them and let them know I'm awake and will be okay."

This time, he saw the look that went across Nurse Anna's face, and he finally settled on what he was feeling in his chest, it was his heart hurting, dread joined the hurt. "Nurse Anna, whats wrong? What's with that look I saw? Why haven't you gone to fetch my family? Whats happened!?"

Nurse Anna was qucikly overwhelmed, she had no idea what to say, she knew the truth, and knew that it was suppossed to be given to him slowly. She started to backstep, "Ah, I.. should go and fetch your doctor."

Before she could step back far enough, Jameson shot his right paw out and snagged her scrubs and dragged her back pulling some stiches in the process. "My doctor!? Why my doctor!? Why not MY FAMILY!?"

Before Nurse Anna could make any protest or reply another nurse opened the door, this one a female deer. "Anna are you okay? I heard yelli...Hey let her go!"

The deer came into the room and Jameson shifted his left eye too look right at her, daring her to try and restrain him. Before he could make a remark Nurse Anna spoke. "Diana its okay, really. He's panicing slighlty, please go get his doctor, the counselor, and that wolf thats always hanging around waiting for him to wake up."

Jameson shifted to look back at Nurse Anna "Counselor? no, no, nonono..."

(Three minutes later)

The second his eyes locked in on the male wolf that accompanied his doctor and the grief counselor it all came back to him at once. The doctors words on what had happened to him and the grief counselors words about the fact that his family were gone was simply muddled background noise to him. He already knew what they were telling him now, that he was attacked and his family was gone, and it was evident by the tears streaming down his face steadily.

He wanted to sob too, but that would mean totally breaking down and not being able to stare at the mammal responsible for their deaths. The wolf was the leader of the three mammal protection detail, the mammal that was supposed to be there that day keeping the the other two vigilant and on task, Johnathan Gellary. Johnathan had adverted his gaze in guilt and took on a submissive stance the second he saw the first tears fall, which had been about 30 seconds after he had walked in. He kept his eyes on Gellary as the the counselor, a deer buck with a gentle voice, told him information he didn't know.

"I'm so very sorry for your losses Mr. Wilde. Your home is a complete loss, firefighters are still sifting through it to see if anything can be recovered that's of value to you…one thing they were able to recover quite quickly though…was the bodies of your wife and daughter. I'm sorry, they're gone. We ID'd them through DNA and Agent Gellary, your wife had remnants of her matching wedding band on her finger and your daughter had remnants of a necklace she always wore..both were to damaged to return to you though I'm afraid. While you're here at the hospital I would like to.."

Jameson cut him off, pointing at Johnathan who doubled his submissive stance. "You. You were supposed to be there."

Jonathan flinched and spoke. "I I I, I'm sorry. You were only supposed..it was a Saturday, and I, I was preoccupied. Andd..."

Jameson leaned up, his pointing never faltering and cut him off. "You were supposed to be there. You knew those two slacked off and didn't do their jobs if you aren't there."

Jonathan tried to make himself smaller, and he started to choke up. " I'm so very sorry, so sorry so sorry so sorry. I wish, I wish I could go back. They they they, they were like family, you you you're like family. I.."

Jameson snapped. "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM!"

Jameson tore off the sheet covering him tearing the stitches on his shoulder blade and then started ripping the IVs out of him. Two male nurses and his doctor, a male mountain lion, rushed forward to restrain him as he began to stand. He momentarily forgot about his left leg and fell down, which helped him as a male deer nurse missed him because of it. Jameson broke the grip of the second nurse, a sheep, and broke his nose with a savage right hook causing the nurse to grab their nose and stumble back. Jameson then reached to the metal rolling table on his right and grabbed a thankfully empty bedpan. Jameson grabbed the edge of it and then punched out catching the deer buck nurse as he was leaning in to grab him, the impact knocking the nurse out cold. Jameson then immediately hurled the bedpan at his doctor catching him right in the nose, breaking it. The whole thing happened in about ten seconds.

Johnathan, Nurse Anna, Nurse Diana, and the grief counselor during all of this hadn't moved much. Once it was over the counselor and Nurse Diana ran out the room to get help, and Johnathan and Nurse Anna were frozen in place. Jameson stood once more, taking into account his leg this time, and began hop running down the bed, leaving a trail of blood as he went. Once he was at the end of the bed he launched himself off and towards Jonathan.

His left shoulder slammed into Jonathan tearing his stitches which he didn't even feel. Johnathan began to fall backwards from the impact and as he fell Jameson raked his claws down the right side of Johnathan's face. Once Johnathan's back his the ground Jameson started to unleash a flurry of punches with his right fist. The whole time this was happening Jonathan did nothing to defend himself, believing his deserved this.

Nurse Anna was still frozen in terror while Jameson was beating Jonathan in a fit of pure rage and the doctor and ram nurse were to busy holding their noses trying to stop the blood. The deer nurse meanwhile was still snoring after getting knocked out, his arms locked up in the air. Finally, Nurse Diana and the grief counselor came back into view, two security guards with them. Jameson paid them no mind as he continued to punch Jonathan. He briefly registered his doctor, still holding his nose, yelling out, "No tazers, just tranqs!"

Jameson then briefly registered the feeling of getting hit with three darts, causing him to fall off of Jonathan and onto the floor. Before he fell into unconsciousness he heard his doctor say. "He tore all of his stitches and re-opened the wound on his shoulder, get him to surgery!"

(One week later)

Once Jameson came to once more, the day after his fit of rage, he spoke not one word. He was unresponsive to any and all attempts to get him to react or speak, he would just stare blankly if he even looked at someone at all. He did not eat or drink either, having to be given the necessary nutrients by IV. His doctor knew what was happening, it was a common things for foxes when their mates died and they had no other tethers to the world like kits or other family members. Jameson had lost his kit with his mate, and as far as he knew, Jameson had no other possible family that could keep him in this world. Simply put, Jameson was dying from heartbreak, and the only reason he was still alive is because the hospital wouldn't allow him to.

It had been a whole week and he hadn't spoken a word, Nurse Anna tried to get him to speak many times to no avail, she was one of the few he'd at least acknowledge they were there. The grief counselor did not exist at all to Jameson, neither did Nurse Diana who he learned through mute listening was the grief counselor's wife. It was the same with the rest of the nurses and the doctors, they would ask him questions, they receive not even a twitch of the eye in response. Oh Jameson was listening, always, registering what was said but being to consumed with immense grief and sadness to respond in any way at all.

Jonathan Gellary on the other paw, was unique in his circumstance. It took him three days but he had summed up the courage and walked back into the hospital room, right side of his face swollen, nose broken and slightly crooked, and a large bandage running down from cheek to nose. The first day he had just sat there in silence, saying nothing and staring at Jameson who did not stare back, to busy thinking of what he should say to the mammal who had just lost everything because he decided that he wasn't needed that day. The second day he had spoke to Jameson, apologizing repeatedly, giving explanations to why he was not there, beating himself up, and saying he deserved the beating Jameson had given him. Both days Jameson did not react, on the third day Jameson did have some reaction that would continue for the rest…rumbles, growls, snarls, basic instinctual reactions to threats or enemies..it was another thing Jonathan felt he deserved.

It was the seventh day, Nurse Anna was in the room with him this time, sitting on his bed with her legs crossed telling him tales of some of her younger siblings. Currently she was regaling a comedic tale about her younger sister Julie, 20 and nine years his junior. Jameson was staring blankly at her, hearing what she was saying but other than that nothing. No facial movements, no eye movement, not a single twitch of the body or movement of the tail, no thoughts, he was still completely catatonic.

Suddenly, the fog was lifted, it wasn't really any specific thing or revelation noteworthy…more it was the realization within his subconscious that if he stayed catatonic they would not let him leave this hospital, and they wouldn't let him die, so he had to move and speak…if only a little. Nurse Anna was busy laughing at the tale she was telling so she didn't notice his sudden shift in demeanor.

"Hahaha oh that tale always cracks me up Jameson. I hope you enjoyed it."

Jameson kept a blank face and a level tone when he spoke. "I did."

Nurse Anna almost fell off the bed when he spoke. "Sweet Karma, Jameson!"

"Yes?"

Even in the state he was in he couldn't help the snark. Nurse Anna ignored it, "You're talking!"

"I am aware."

"You've been catatonic for a whole week! I wasn't sure you were gonna snap out of it!"

Jameson kept the same level tone, blank face, and simple sentences.. and it would stay that way for the remainder of his stay. "Again, I am aware."

"I should go get your doctor!"

"Uh huh."

(One more week later)

He had been in the hospital for three weeks now. He was well on the mend, able to use his left arm with moderation, like using a cane. He was also very ready to leave so he could die in peace. He wanted to see his family again, but this stupid hospital and its stupid policies were keeping him alive despite his wishes. He tried his best to explain it, but his doctor vehemently stated that as long as he was in their care, he would be kept alive, Bunnyburrow policy.

Luckily for him, he was being discharged in a couple of days. Jonathan, who he still only growled or rumbled at, was told what his wishes were and that he was making it difficult for the hospital. Jonathan to his knowledge, decided to get him discharged and put in a small CIA safe house so he could finally die. As it stood right now he was still given nutrients by IV, though now he made it a hassle, rumbling and growling.

The grief counselor simply gave up talking to him during the second week. Jameson now speaking, albeit very little, simply told him to "get the fuck out." Whenever he entered so, the counselor finally started to listen midway through the week. Nurse Diana stayed away from his room, completely terrified of him. His doctor checked in every now and again, his voice now nasally when he spoke due to Jameson breaking his nose, which he apologized for. "Sorry, but you where in my way." The deer and ram nurse he also apologized to, saying the same thing he told his doctor.

Nurse Anna was in his room again, humming to herself as she read a book. She spent almost all of her break times in his room, speaking to him or just being in his presence. He didn't know why, and he wouldn't ask because that required him talking more. He expected her to be terrified of him, she had watched him beat Jonathan to a pulp after all, but yet she was here everyday at least once a day. He didn't mind it really, he actually kinda liked it though he couldn't explain it and she hadn't given a reason.

Jameson after about an hour decided he had to use the restroom, he cleared his throat to get her attention. "Ahem."

Nurse Anna looked up at him, closing her book after she marked the page. "Yes Jameson? What is it?"

"Need my cane."

"Okay, bathroom?"

"Mhm."

"Alright."

Nurse Anna gave him his cane and helped him stand. He nodded his thanks and then limped into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He did his business and then went to the sink, and began to wash his paws, floating his left foot of the ground so he wouldn't fall over. Once his paws were dry he looked into the mirror, grasping the sides of the sink as he did so. As he looked into the mirror and time passed, he started to grasp the sink tighter and tighter. After a minute, he leaned back and punched the mirror, cracking it as he roared to his reflection, "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM!"


	4. Johnathan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See? I had two for you. Sorry again. 
> 
> As you may have noticed, there has been a title change. As I was writing this chapter I realized that this prolouge was going to be way bigger than I had originally thought, so I decided to make it seperate from the main story.
> 
> This chapter quickly turned into a way to give the charcter Johnathan Gellary more substance because as a character he was kinda just, there. This chapter adds some bones to his structure as he will be returning in the main story.

_A raging inferno flew across Jameson's subconscious leaving ash and smoke suspended in black before him. Then his vision cleared revealing the hospital room bathroom rimmed with crackling and roaring flames. Jameson saw the mirror and it Jameson saw his reflection. Then it shimmered and his wife and daughter materialized next to his refection. It caused him to smile, but it was cut short by his families faces changing from smiles to frowns, then looks of fear and horror, then in a moment they were crumbling ash._

_Jason looked at the mirror in utter horror and despair. Then rage took him and he slammed his fist into the mirror while roaring out "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM!"_

_From the crack erupted flames and after that the scene became erratic flashes of him punching the mirror over again with his roar in the background. Finally with the mirror covered in cracks it exploded outward throwing a rain of glass, and behind it a raging inferno. The scene froze mid explosion before reversing leaving Jameson just staring into the mirror. His vision cleared._

(Jameson, two days later)

It had been two days since he finally got out of the hospital and into the CIA safe house in Cadbury. It was a meager apartment, and could probably be better described as a hotel room with its size and layout. But, Jameson wasn't picky, it was as good of a place to die than any. Although there was a snag in his dying, he originally thought Jonathan got him out so he could die, but instead he got him out in a misguided attempt to try and stop him his way.

Jonathan from what best Jameson could figure wanted to save him, because he completely and utterly failed to save his starlights. It would just be another failure, but Johnathan was apparently going to make him work for it. Before he had even arrived Jonathan had all of the knives removed from the apartment and any rope that was there. Jameson would have gotten creative with it, but two agents were with him 24/7 to keep him from killing himself…it was very annoying.

Johnathan was so thorough that he had him sedated and then filed his claws down so Jameson couldn't cut his wrists. Then he put rubber guards on all of his teeth so he couldn't use his fangs to do the job either. It was of course a better option than muzzling Jameson, the last time someone muzzled him was when he was captured, a long story really. But what's important is he ripped the mammals arm off that muzzled him and beat them to death with it. When he was done he tossed the arm onto the corpse, turned to the team that had just burst through the door to save him, saw what he did and heard him say, "I fucking hate muzzles." After that's a "no muzzles ever" was very quickly scribbled onto his file.

Luckily for him they couldn't force him to eat or drink water, so it was death by starvation then. It definitely wasn't his first choice, or his second, or his 22nd either. Dying of starvation is a slow and painful process, but it was the only option he had left…that is unless of course something were to happen to give him the opportunity to get something sharp or a gun and then he could see his family again, he could stop feeling the constant vice grip on his heart. The pure and utter despair, the unfathomable grief, the sadness, it would finally melt away and he could be at peace with his two starlights again.

Although Jonathan was determined to bother him the whole way to the grave. So far Johnathan was there in the apartment everyday, for six hours. During those six hours he would keep his distance and speak, say anything he could to try and in Johnathan's words "snap you out of this ridiculous crusade to kill yourself."

Johnathan mostly kept this distance because if he got in the range of Jameson, Jameson would break his neck. It was no exaggeration either because Jameson said as much, and it was the one sentence Jameson spoke to him before going back to growling and snarling at him.

"Jonathan if you come within my reach while you're here I'll break your fucking neck so bad I'll be able to rip out your spine and beat your corpse with it, and that's no threat but a godsdamn promise."

So Johnathan kept a well and respectful distance, the two agents kept their distance as well. Not because Jameson told them to, they doubted…well mostly doubted that the threat of neck breaking and spine beating extended to them. But they also knew that if they did get close enough Jameson would force their paw to kill him. They knew he was desperate enough, they knew why, and they couldn't blame him. They knew how mates were for foxes, they themselves saw the love he had for his starlights as he called them. If they had their way they'd hand him a gun and walk outside, let the fox do what he wants, but they couldn't, Jonathan was and charge and while they despised the wolf he was still in charge. So Jameson got no gun, and he was gonna starve himself, a shit way to die…and they were gonna have to watch it happen.

Johnathan himself seemed to take all of this in stride, understanding it. The hate he received from practically the entire agency in this entire area because of what he did, or more what he didn't was well deserved after all. Jameson was the most respected agent in the entire region, a former dark agent turned lead analyst and strategist after falling in love with a bunny and marrying said bunny. Many agents didn't like a fox a bunny being together, quite a few didn't particularly like foxes, but at the end of the day they respected him because of who he was. And, as far as his marrying a bunny, the agents saw the deep unfathomable love he had for his bunny and his daughter. There was no denying they were madly in love, so it was hard for those who opposed of the relationship to speak their mind, and in the end some minds were changed.

Johnathan clearly saw how opinions of him had turned sour at the agency office. The assistant director themselves called him in a day after the murder of Sarah and Racheal Jumps-Wilde and the attack on Jameson just to tell him he was a piece of shit.

"Agent Gellary. Come in and sit down I'll keep this short." As Johnathan sat the assistant director, a female deer sneered at him with such disgust and immediately said "You're a piece of shit. Gods that felt good to say. You are a piece of rotten garbage and a disgrace to this branch of, no the entire CIA. If it were up to me your ass would be on the curb right now bloody and jobless. You abandoned your post for your own selfish reasons and as a consequence two VIPs who happened to be the wife and daughter of our best agent to be killed, their house to be burned down, him to be mortally and potentially fatally wounded, and two other agents to be brutally hacked to death. You know the two wolves who you let die, so once I'm done you will go down to officially ID the bodies while the families wait outside, the bodies are to gruesome and they shouldn't have to see that. So you will, and then you will walk out those doors look them in the eyes and tell them that's them, and you will tell them why they died."

The director leaned forward a bit and delivered her last few lines. "If Jameson Wilde pulls through this he will undoubtedly wish to die having lost his life mate, we can't lose him, he's to valuable. So you will do whatever you fucking have to to get him to stay alive. If you fail you will resign immediately, and then shortly after I will have a wet work team pay you a visit. Succeed and you will transfer to a small remote office, I don't care which, and work out the rest of your days. Killing you should you fail is not a joke, I swear to the gods I will put you in a body bag. Jameson Wilde is one of the best and brightest mammals I have ever met, a treasure to this agency and this world. Sarah was my friend and I adored little Rachel, that's I have to say to you and I grow tired of looking at your face, get out."

Johnathan of course did as he was bade and left without a single word. He didn't bother arguing because he knew he deserved it, all of it, because they were right. He was selfish and abandoned his post, and mammals under his watch died. Mammals he considered family, and the one surviving mammal of his actions, if that mammal pulled through, would hate him for an eternity if he didn't just straight up kill him first.

When Jameson did wake and maul his face as well as pummel it into the ground it didn't come as a surprise to Johnathan. Honestly he knew if the guards hadn't tranqed Jameson he would have beat him to death, and Johnathan accepted that fact quite openly. He wore a bandage for the first week after Jameson raked his claws down his face, but after he kept them off his his face and made sure the wound healed badly and scarred badly. Why? Because he deserved it and so much more, and it would serve as a constant reminder of his failure. But, before he got his due he at least had to try and save Jameson, more for the fact that there was a promise made between Jameson and Sarah then anything else. This promise though would only be brought up as a last result though, bringing it up right now wouldn't be wise.

The results of his actions didn't just effect his work, it effected his personal life too. His wife, the wife he had decided not to show up to work for, left him. She was horrified of the fact that he abandoned his post and as a result Sarah and Rachel died, and as far as she was concerned, Jameson wasn't far behind them. When she left she took the pups with her, they left quite willingly. His daughter wouldn't look at him and he son actually spit on him. They couldn't comprehend what he did. The day they left he had a large argument as they packed their bags, finally exploding and trying to justify things. As with all arguments they had, he lost and Karen took the pups.

The argument was well under way, Karen walking around him in the hallway "What do you mean you're leaving!?"

Karen whirled on him, the open suitcase in her paw spilling out some clothes. "I mean I'm leaving John, and I'm taking the pups with me. You abandoned your post and as a result four mammals died, soon to be five! Two of those were agents that were over here every Saturday night for poker night! You knew that those two always goofed off, got distracted, and wouldn't do their jobs properly if you weren't their to keep them focused! And because you weren't there they did just that! They probably never even saw them coming!"

Johnathan flailing his arms about and yelled "Don't you think I know that! They were my friends Karen!"

His wife pointed a finger at him and harshly said "and you left them and they died. Hacked to death by machetes. You know I tried to console their mates? You know, two of my best friends? They. Couldn't. Even. Look. At. Me. Why? Because the wolf I married abandoned their husbands and as a result they died, brutally."

Johnathan's shoulders sagged and he started to say something but his she wolf was on a roll. "I…"

"No shut up, I'm not finished. Not only did those two agents die, your friends. Sarah Jumps died too, the greatest mammal I've ever met, my very best friend. You let her die choking on smoke as the home she built with her fox burned with her inside it. Oh and let's not forget you let a little girl die. The sweetest little girl on the planet, the girl that was your daughters best friend, and the girl your son adored and had a crush on, Rachel Jumps. She died in her mothers arms, so scared because everything was burning around her. How terrified she must had been in her final moments, when you close your eyes do you see her terrified face stained with tears? Feel her final moments and hear her cry of terror as her mother lies to her? Shushes her as she tries to calm her down knowing what's about to happen? I do. I see it every time."

Karen paused for a moment to scoop up the clothes that had fallen from the bag before continuing. "Oh and let's not forget your best friend James. He's a fox, a species that can LITERALLY die from heartbreak, who had a life mate, and because of you that life mate is dead. Sure he could pull through the heartbreak if he had a tether, like a kit, but his kit died too. But this is of course all assuming he does pull through which is sketchy at best! Why is it sketchy? Because he took two severe and very deep machete chops, one tearing through his right shoulder! How did he get those? He got those because he came home to his house burning with his family inside and as was attacked by the ones who set it ablaze! Mammals you could have stopped HAD YOU BEEN THERE TO DO YOUR JOB!"

Johnathan finally snapped. "YOU DON'T THINK I RELIZE THAT KAREN! I REALIZE AND KNOW ALL OF IT! I didn't go in that day because it was one off Jameson's off days, I knew because of that he would only be gone a few hours! So I didn't go in! Because I wanted to spend time with you and the pups! You ALWAYS say you wish I would spend more time with them! SO I DID! HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THERE WOULD BE AN ATTACK! There was no credible intel of any threats to the Wildes, no chatter, NOTHING! THERE WAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO INDICATE THIS WOULD HAPPEN! There had been NOTHING even REMOTELY RESEMBLING a threat to the Wildes! FOR. EIGHT. YEARS! I honestly kept the protection detail going on as a TOKEN to James!"

Johnathan knew he made a mistake in bursting when his she wolf took on a calm face and started approaching him. He managed a single step back before Karen slapped him HARD on the left side of his face. The slap cooled his jets right quick, and hard shove that followed mellowed him the rest of the way, shouting at his she wolf never turned out good. But, he had to get his side of the story off of his chest, his justification, sadly it left a bad taste in his mouth to try and defend his actions. Karen shoved him once more before turning and hastily walking into their bedroom.

Johnathan didn't move an inch after he had been slapped and shoved, he felt that's it was unwise to move. Experience taught him that even the slightest action while his she wolf was in a mood was a very very bad idea. After a few minutes of standing there, his face still burning from the slap, his Karen finally came out of their bedroom carrying one two suitcases filled to the brim. She stopped just shy of him and he timidly stepped aside so she may pass. Karen brushed by him and entered their living room. The second she was in the middle of it she called out, "pups are you ready to go!?"

Johnathan watched as his son and daughter came out of their respective rooms bags packed. His younger daughter Tia wouldn't even look at him as she walked to her mother, once she was there she turned her back to him. Johnathan couldn't help but try and get his little girl to look at him. "Tia, little princess, can you look at daddy?" Instead of looking at him, she instead scooted closer to her mother, she wouldn't even say a word. His son Tyler came out next backpack on one shoulder and a suitcase in paw, Tyler was the same age as Rachel and it was true, he had had a huge crush on the little doe. Hearing of her death hit him hard, and he hadn't spoken since learning of her death. Johnathan was a firm believer in falling in love and he could tell that his son, before even hitting puberty had fallen hard for that little doe, and that little doe was dead because of him.

Because of that, Tyler had a permanent glare of hatred every time he looked at him, and it was the same glare he was giving him no. Johnathan just had to try though. "Come on Tyler, you don't really wanna leave do you? I know I messed up but come on buddy, can you even hug your old man?" He saw a different look take on Tyler's face and Johnathan watched as Tyler slowly put his bag on the living room carpet and start walking towards him. Johnathan lowered himself down to tyler's height and opens his arms, a hopeful smile on his face. As Tyler stepped in close to him he waited for Tyler to initiated the hug before wrapping his own arms around him. But instead of Tyler slowly hugging him, Tyler looked right at him and spit in his face.

Johnathan reeled back in shock, not believing what had just happened. Part of him wanted to discipline his pup but the rest of him knew he no longer had the power to. So he simply wiped the spit off his face and stood as he watched his son walk back over to his bag and then back over to his mother. Once his son was next to his mother Karen looked down at their pups and softly said "go wait in the car, I will be there shortly."

Johnathan watched as his son helped his little sister outside before giving him one last glare before shutting the door. Once that door shut, Johnathan knew that he pups were out of his life for good. Johnathan looked to his wife as she put her bags down and let out a sigh, he could tell her rage at him had cooled down, but her resolve of leaving hadn't in the slightest. So Johnathan slowly trod over his chair and sank down into it, immediately putting his head into his paws once he did. After a minute or so he saw his wife feet through his finger and looked up at her, it appeared she had some final things to say to him.

Karen looked at him with the same disappointed look she's had since she learning of what he did before opening her maw to speak. "All of those things you yelled at me..was shit and you know it. Yes I always say you should spend more time with the pups John. But while you're HERE and NOT WORKING. I knew that when you had to work that your couldn't take it off because your work was making sure mammals stayed ALIVE, mammals I held very dear to my heart, and to yours. Whether or not there was no viable information of a threat to them, I remember you telling me that you must always be prepared for one irregardless. Token or not, it was still your job to keep his wife and daughter safe, and you failed. They died, your friends died, and pretty soon I'm sure your best friend is going to die. I lost practically my whole circle of friends as a result, your daughter lost her best friend, and your son lost a mammal he adored….Look I love you, and I will always love you. Your my mate and I chose you for a reason…but now, now I can't even look at you without seeing Sarah and Rachel's faces, I can't stop hearing their screams, and I can't stand the fact that you abandoned and they died. I can't stand to keep experiencing this, and I can't stand to look at you right now…neither can the pups…Honestly I don't know if we ever will. So we're leaving John, and I don't know if we're coming back, and if we do it won't be for quite some time."

With his wife's speech done all Johnathan could do was nod in understanding. He watched as his mate went back over to her bags and picked them up, moving to the front door after. She opened it and looked back saying "goodbye John."

Johnathan gave her a sad smile and replied "goodbye Karen." After that she walked out the door.

Johnathan put his head back into his paws and stayed that way for another twenty minutes, his shoulders shaking from quiet sobs. He only stopped when his phone started to ring. Looking at it through tear filled eyes he saw it was from the hospital, he quickly wiped his eyes and answered it. "Hello?"

"Yes hi this is Nurse Diana at Bunnyburrow General. I was told to notify you once Jameson Wilde awoke. Well he's awake now, and freaking out. You should get here."

Johnathan wiped his eyes some more and the stood while replying "thank you for notifying me, I am on my way, I don't live far." He hung up immediately after, grabbed his keys, and headed for the door.


	5. The Promise

It was now six days since Jameson left the hospital. It was also six days since he had eaten or drank…and quite frankly ...it sucked. But it wasn't like he had any choice in the matter, bastards wouldn't give him a gun. It was still the same routine as the first two days, he would crawl out of the bed he barely slept in..mostly because two sets of eyes were watching him more than anything. Then he would sit at the little round table by the door and get served meals that would sit there until they turned ice cold and were removed. Then when it was well into the night he would crawl back into bed and start the cycle over again.

Of course, there was the little interventions by Johnathan in between. Of course, Johnathan still wouldn't come near him from fear of a broken neck. But he was still determined to keep Jameson from killing himself. As the days went by Johnathan was getting more and more desperate to try and get through to him and his words were falling on deaf ears. He wasn't the only one though, even the two guards watching him tried to talk to him. To those conversations James would actually respond, albeit very short and curt, and not the answers they were hoping for.

James when he did manage to sleep didn't sleep for long, to many dreams and nightmares. Most wouldn't consider dreams to be bad things, but when those dreams are about the family you just lost…they are bad. It was now midday of day six and his lunch had now become ice cold, one of the wolf guards came up and removed it while Jameson just blankly stared forward. The other wolf guard sighed and opened the trash can lid so the other could dump the food. Then they went back to watching the catatonic fox.

It was about an hour later when Johnathan Gellary walked into the apartment. But, this time it was different than usual ...this time he brought something with him. In Johnathan's right paw was a big plastic evidence bag and inside it was Jameson's Schofield Revolver. Johnathan walked towards the table and tossed it onto it, right next to James' right paw.

"They found it this morning, under some debris. There's a couple dings and it's filthy…but it's functional... And before you try using it I unloaded it, its empty. I figured you would want it back since your wife gave it to you."

Jameson looked down at his revolver and slowly reached for it. Taking it in his paws he opened the bad and took it out, running his paw down the barrel. He looked at the gun longingly, wishing Johnathan had forgotten to unload it. Seeing what Johnathan had said about the gun being filthy he grabbed the cloth by him and began cleaning as best he could without gun oil, focusing on the engravings. He did this for about five minutes before Johnathan spoke up again.

"I also found this in the woods, it had been blown away by the wind and was some ways in it, but I found it."

Jameson shifted his gaze towards Johnathan and saw him clutching Jameson's hat. Jameson immediately held out his paw and spoke to Johnathan for the first time since he threatened breaking his neck. James throat may have been completely dried up drom lack of water, ane his lips a cracked mess...but he was always stubborn about his health so he spoke anyways. "Give it to me, please."

Johnathan, though hesitant to approach Jameson in fear of his neck being broken approached him and handed him his hat. Jameson took it and clutched it to his chest, closing his eyes for a moment. Once that moment was over Jameson stood and said, "Thank you for this."

After that Jameson grabbed his revolver, stood and began to hobble slowly towards the two guards. The guards looked at each other a little nervously as he came to a stop in front of them. Jack slowly looked up at them and said, "could you two move please? You're in my way."

The two guards looked at each other in confusion before both sidestepped allowing Jameson to walk forward. There wasn't much they were standing in front of, just a wall and the dresser..but the dresser was what he wanted to get to.

Jameson sat his cowboy hat down on the middle of the dresser and then laid his revolver down in front of the hat. Next, he reached into his left pocket and pulled out his wallet and opening it, pulling out the photograph of him and his wife and daughter. In the photograph he was standing behind his two does. His left paw was on his wife's shoulder, her paw on his and their matching wedding bands showing. He looked at that photo for a few minutes, stroking it and letting a few tears fall. Then, he put the photo on his hat, putting it sticking out of the rope he had wrapped around it so if wouldn't fall.

He stood there for a few minutes, just staring at the vigil he had created. Then he felt a tap on his shoulder, turning he was surprised to see Johnathan right behind him. While Jameson had made a promise, he would break Johnathan's neck if he got in range of him…but right now he was too sad, tired, and weak to do it. But that didn't mean he couldn't show the hatred in his eyes when he asked "what?"

Johnathan simply replied "here."

Looking down he saw Johnathan holding several candles and a lighter.

Jameson took the candles and lighters and placed the candles around the items and lit them, standing back to observe the vigil he had made. Suddenly one of the wolf guards started to chant, it was a traditional wolf mourning song. Soon, Johnathan and the other wolf guard joined in the mourning song. Jameson quickly lost his composure and broke down in tears as the wolf's chanted their song.

The song went on for a few minutes before it came to a stop. At that point, James had crumpled to the ground with wracking sobs and the two guards helped him to his feet and over to the table. It took James some time to stop crying and when he did and looked up he saw Johnathan and the two guards sitting there with him. What happened next was completely unexpected for everyone present in the room. James and them spent the ENTIRE night talking and telling stories like they were old friends and James didn't want to kill one of them. They talked about a lot of things, though mostly about family, telling stories about them, remembering, and in the case of James' two does mourning and reminiscing.

As the sun rose up the horizon James actually has a small smile in his muzzle from spending the entire night telling stories about his two does and hearing stories about the three wolves' families. Once the sun had risen into the sky the conversation came to a close. Johnathan received a call that quite literally had him scrambling out of the door and the two guards started prepping Jameson's breakfast, hoping since he talked with them through the night he would eat. They were mistaken.

As they laid the plate of eggs and French toast in front of him, his favorite and go to breakfast, Jameson looked up at them slowly with a raised eyebrow. The one who laid the plate down, a brown wolf with the last name Decker threw his paws up in the air and yelled out "sweet fucking Karma! Come on James! I thought we made ground last night!"

Jameson slowly blinked twice and replied "we didn't, telling stories about my family and hearing stories about yours isn't gonna miraculously change me mind. I LOST my MATE and my KIT, I have NOTHING left for me here, I WANT to be with my FAMILY again. The ONLY way I do that is if I DIE. You want this to stop? GIVE ME YOUR GUN AND LEAVE."

The other wolf guard, a black wolf with the last name of Druid looked at Decker and said, "we should do it."

Jameson's ears weakly perked at that and Decker yelled out "what!? Druid are you serious!?"

Druid nodded and tersely replied "why shouldn't we? Really? Why not? James has lost everything! I know what it is for foxes to lose their life mates! Trying to keep him alive is just pointless! Cruel really! He has no tether like a kit and no other family! Not to mention I highly doubt he's one of those rare few foxes that can imprint on more than one mammal and life mate with them! Making him starve himself to death is just plain wrong!"

The argument continued on for another fifteen minutes, and much to Jameson's annoyance Decker claimed victory. But it was simply because of the fact that if they allowed Jameson to shoot himself they'd be up a creek of lava…and quite likely to be right behind him to the grave. James of course was less happy about it; he was hoping Druid would win so he could stop starving himself to death. But since Decker claimed the victory it was still death by starvation. The only upside was Jameson figured he'd only last another few days, so there was that.

As the plate of French toast started to cool, Decker scooped it up and said "well if you're not gonna eat it I damn sure will. Should be a crime not to let good French toast go to waste."

So, with Jameson not eating the days normal schedule fit into place. Well, until Johnathan returned that is. It was in the evening when he returned, and Jameson's untouched dinner had just been cleared away. Johnathan opened the door to the small apartment and poked his head in and said to the two guards "can I get one of your help real quick? I got something down in my SUV and it's too heavy to get up here alone.

The two wolves looked at each other and Decker, no longer trusting Druid said, "Druid you should go help him out."

Druid nodded and walked out with Jonathan, Druid pausing to prop the door open. Jameson, once Johnathan mentioned whatever it was being heavy, had a pretty good idea what it was. Johnathan spent a lot of time at Jameson's house sifting through it with the team there looking for things they could recover. One thing Jameson was very confident that it would be recovered was a very old chest. This chest, while very old, was also very very robust and fireproof.

The wood would probably be blackened and charred, and the metal burnt black. But, in the end it would be intact which is what counted to Jameson. Then, there was the matter of what was in the chest. The chest was split into two sides, the left side contained photo albums, trinkets, mementos, nicknacks, etcetera. But, the right side contained old gear from his days as Scythe, including some of his old weapons ...like his 1911 that sat loaded on the very top.

The best part about the chest though, was that it couldn't be broken open or picked. No, it could only be opened with a very old key…a key that happened to be on a thin leather strap around Jameson's neck. Also, said key was not known to be on him and no one but him knew what was in the chest. So if it indeed was the chest being brought up, he would be able to open it and then retrieve his weapon and end his misery…then he could finally be with his family again.

Sure enough, five minutes later Jameson heard the telltale signs of two mammals carrying something very heavy up a flight of stairs. It took another five minutes before Johnathan and Druid re-entered carrying just as Jameson guessed it, his chest. Grunting as they entered with it Druid and Johnathan carried it over to the dresser and set it down beside it. Johnathan took a minute to recover and slow his panting while Druid went and sat on the couch panting as well.

Once Johnathan recovered, he began to speak. "I believe this looks familiar to you. We found it in the basement. Fire marshal guesses as the second and first floor weakened the weight of the chest caused it to fall through and fall into the basement where it was then buried in debris. The chest is completely intact, it just now has a burnt wood appearance to it. Now since I assume whatever key opened this chest was lost in the fire, I went to several different locksmiths to try and get it unlocked. But they all said this chest is uncrackable, so without the key I'm sorry to say you'll never be able to open it. Well, at least that's what they said, I figure though that if you could draw what the key looked like I could try and get one made."

Jameson stood from the table and began shuffling towards the chest. "That won't be necessary."

Jameson reached into his shirt and pulled out the key attached to the strap. "The key never leaves my side; the chest contains precious memories so I always keep the key with me."

Johnathan quickly moved out of his way as Jameson went by and fell to his knees in front of the chest. Jameson patted the chest a few times and then wiped his paw on part of the front of it, brushing off some ash. When the ash fell away on that part it exposed the scythe engraved in the now blackened metal. Jameson patted the chest a couple more time before grabbing the key and pulling, breaking the leather strap. He then entered the key and began turning, this chest had a combination of turns you had to make before it unlocked and opened. As he began to turn, he paused and slowly looked over his shoulder. This gave the q for the wolves to give a collective "oh" and quickly turn around. Jameson first turned it halfway clockwise, three quarters the way counterclockwise, quarter way clockwise, and then finally a full rotation counterclockwise and clockwise.

With the combination entered the chest let out a hiss as the tumblers unlocked and metal blocks popped out around the front and side of the chest. Johnathan and the two guards turned at the sound and observed the bars come out. Johnathan took this moment to inspect the chest, that's when he noticed the scythe engraved on the chest. Johnathan immediately waved the guards forward and said "James, before you open that we're gonna have to search for it."

As Druid and Decker stepped forward Jameson sighed and stood, turning to face them. As he turned Jameson snagged one of the light candles and tossed at Decker, catching his jacket on fire. Decker immediately panicked screaming "HOLY SHIT THE CRAZY BASTARD CAUGHT ME ON FIRE!"

Druid immediately shifted to help Decker get the jacket off before the rest of him caught fire and that left only Johnathan. Jameson solved that problem by summoning all of his remaining strength and putting it into an uppercut. The uppercut slammed Johnathan's maw shut and snapped his head up, causing him to stumble back and trip, falling to the floor. Jameson quickly turned back and yanked the lid open and grabbed his 1911, turning back and putting it to his temple as he pulled the hammer back.

By that time Decker's flaming jacket was off and outside, and Johnathan was getting up and as he did he yelled out. "Alright that's it! Fine! I give up! You win! Your so damn desperate to put a bullet in your brain fine! I give up on trying to convince you otherwise!"

Druid and Decker gave each other puzzled looks but otherwise said nothing as Johnathan continued. "But you know what before you end your own godsdamn life I'm gonna say something, but first move!"

Jameson was so confused in this moment, so he did as he was asked and moved aside. Johnathan reached into the chest and after a second pulled out a picture of Sarah, turned on Jameson, pointed to the picture and continued. "She would be so very disappointed in you!"

Jameson reeled back in shock at that bold statement and Johnathan built on it. "Yeah I said it James! She would be completely and utterly disappointed in you for ending your own life! You wanna know why she would be so disappointed in you!? Because you'd be breaking the fucking promise you made to her!"

Jameson's eyes glazed over a bit and Johnathan continued. "What, did you forget about that promise you made her!? You know, the one that if she died before you that you would move on! The one where you wouldn't let grief consume you! That you wouldn't kill yourself! The one where you would mourn her, and then you would try and find someone new! The one where you would keep on living for her! That you would go home to Zootopia! Reconnect with your mother and brother! Remember that your own daughter made you make that promise to her to!? That if she ever died you wouldn't let the grief consume you and you would move on! Keep living! DO YOU NOT REMEMBER THOSE PROMISES!? OR DO YOU JUST NOT CARE!? HUH!? YOU PROMISED YOUR STARLIGHTS YOU WOULD KEEP LIVING AND MOVE ON! BUT HERE YOU ARE GUN TO YOUR HEAD READY TO PULL THE TRIGGER! HOW DISAPPOINTED THEY MUST BE LOOKING DOWN ON YOU NOW!"

Jameson's paw holding the gun was now shaking and tears were flowing down his face. Johnathan began walking towards the door as he continued. "So, if you want to break that promise you made fine! But when you get up to heaven and see your starlights how disappointed and contemptuous they will be! Your mother will never know what happened to her eldest son and your younger brother will never know where his big brother went! If you can truly cope with all of that then by all means pull the damn trigger! But I'm not gonna watch you do it! Druid! Decker! Let's go."

All three of the wolves filed out of the apartment leaving Jameson all alone and Jameson was mentally reeling. He stood in that same stop with the gun to his head for hours before he walked over to the table and sat down, putting the gun under his chin. He sat there for a very long time, his paw shaking and his mind reeling. Eventually, as Jameson sat there with his gun pointed at him as the hours ticked by….he passed out. The paw holding the gun fell to his lap and his head slumped onto the table.


	6. Starlights Under the Oak Tree part 1

Prologue Part Five: Starlights Under the Oak Tree

When Jameson awoke, it was in a field of wheat…and everything looked…..ethereal. Jameson sat up and noticed the constant gentle breeze, and he watched mesmerized as the wheat gently waved back and forth. " _I can feel it…this isn't a dream ...I must be dead…I have to be."_

Jameson slowly stood and realized that his clothes were different from the ones he had died in, he was now wearing black slacks, vest, and tie with a white button up undershirt with the sleeves rolled up past his elbows. Jameson then on a whim felt he right side of his muzzle and noticed the scar was gone. Then he felt his right ear the knicks were gone too. He even speculated that his left eye wasn't colorless anymore either. Jameson finally lifted the left pant leg and saw that the terrible scar was gone too.

Then Jameson realized he even felt great, he wasn't tired, weak, or depressed. His fur was shining, he wasn't hungry or thirsty, all of the weight he had lost was back. His mind was clear, and he was happy. Jameson let out a laugh of pure joy as he began walking through the field of wheat, feeling the gentle breeze in his fur. As he walked through the field he let his right paw run through the wheat. He walked for what felt like miles across the wheat field. But, he eventually saw something in the distance…a big hill with a massive oak tree on top of it. " _I know that tree."_

Jameson picked up his pace a little but not by much as he began to walk towards the hill. As he was about twenty yards away from the hill, humming a little tune the whole while, he heard the joyous laughter of a child. Jameson stopped dead in his tracks as he heard it again. _"I know that laugh!"_

Jameson took off in a run up the hill and when he reached the top, he saw the most beautiful sight in the world. His daughter, his little doe, his little starlight was on the swing he had put up for her when she was three, swinging back and forth as she laughed with joy. Tears sprung to his eyes as James called out to his daughter. "Hey my little starlight."

Rachel's head snapped towards him and she let out the biggest smile as she screamed out "daddy!" She jumped off the swing and ran full tilt towards Jameson laughing all the while. Jameson dropped to his knees as his daughter launched herself towards him. Jameson caught her in his arms and immediately enveloped her into a big hug. A kneeled their stroking her head for a minute before he whispered in her ear, "oh I've missed you so much my little starlight."

Rachel hugged him as tight as she could as she said, "I've missed you too, daddy."

Jameson was trying hard not to cry and managing it just barely. Jameson released his daughter and said, "here let me look at you."

Rachel let go of him and stepped back a little so he could look at her. Looking at his daughter up and down he let out the biggest smile he ever had as he said, "well look at you, you're positively glowing!"

Jameson wasn't kidding, his kit was literally glowing. Her fur had a soft glow to it and there was a golden ethereal outline around her body. Jameson took a second to observe himself and noticed that only his fur had a soft glow to it, the golden outline was missing. His little starlight noticed it and said, "you're not dead daddy."

Jameson's gaze went back to his daughter and he said, "what do you mean my little starlight?"

Instead of his daughter answering a voice behind him answered him. "What our daughter means James is you're having a near death experience. Mostly because I needed to talk to you, and someone was kind enough to allow this."

Jameson released his daughter and whipped around, his tail brushing over his daughter's face causing her to let out a little giggle. Now facing his rear James saw his wife standing there with a smile on her face and a soft glow about her with an ethereal gold body outline. James immediately stood and took off in a sprint towards his wife. Sarah let out a little laugh as Jameson reached her and took her into his arms, lifting her up and spinning around in circles a few times.

James brought his wife back down to the ground and immediately ensnared her in a long and passionate kiss that caused their daughter to let out a "gross!" And look away. This caused James and Sarah to begin laughing during their kiss before ending it, James continuing his hearty laugh afterwards. As he was laughing a few tears of happiness and joy began to streak down his face as he held his mate in his arms and rocked from side to side.

His wife meanwhile was hugging her mate as tight as she could with the biggest smile on her face, cherishing this precious final moment with her husband for as long as it would last. Because though she knew her James would want to stay here with them…he couldn't. She made him make not just a promise to move on…she also made him make a sacred vow to move on, well technically…she made him make two.

The first was a traditional fox vow, foxes could ask their mates to take one vow on their wedding day that could not be denied or ignored. So, on their wedding day she made James take the vow that in the case of her dying well before him he would move on and live for her, rather than dying from heartbreak. The vow he made her take was less serious and more sweet, they would have a date night every week.

The second vow she made him take was basically the same vow, but much more significant within bunny culture. Sarah was quite a religious doe and held a lot of faith in the gods, especially Serendipity and Fertility, both who represented and were depicted as bunnies. So, she took him to a church and made him take the vow kneeled in front of a statue of Serendipity and Fertility. The vow being that if she ever died, he would mourn her and then find a new love, rather than being alone for the rest of his life. Taking a vow like this was sacred in bunny culture and was supposed to never be broken. So, she made him take two sacred vows, one for fox culture and one for bunny culture. This was something that was never done before, so when Sarah died...The gods took notice.

As James held his wife while his tears of joy fell their daughter turned back around and saw them. "Daddy, why are you sad?"

Sarah looked up at her mate and smiled as she saw his tears of joy and coyly said "oh you foxes, so emotional."

James let out a watery chuckle at that and removed one of his paws from his wife just so he could wipe some of the tears away before using it to beckon his daughter over to them. As his daughter began speed walking towards them James let out a sniffle before saying "I'm not sad my little starlight, I'm just so, so happy to see you and mommy again."

As Rachel reached them, she let out an "oh" before joining the hug, hugging her dad's leg as tight as she could. James went back down to his knees so he could hug daughter better while keeping his left arm wrapped around his mate's waist and his head on her chest. Sarah couldn't help but smile even wider as she stroked the longer white fur on her husband's head, ears, and the back of the neck.

Soon though a couple of tears popped up in her eyes as well. Because as much as she enjoyed holding her husband in her arms again, he had a limited time here before he was going to be sent back. So, they needed to get the ball rolling, or he would get sent back before she could say everything. Moving one of her paws to his cheek Sarah gently said, "James we need to talk, you can't stay here, and we have a limited time before you're sent back.

James quickly looked up at his wife, his chin now resting on her chest as he looked up at her with concern and shock, new tears sprouting from his eyes. "what!? why can't I stay here!? I want to stay here! With you! And our daughter! There is nothing for me back there but misery because you're not there! Our daughters not there! Why do I have to go back!?"

Sarah could see her fox was panicking about the prospect of not being able to stay here with them, starting to hyperventilate and erratic eye movement. Sarah grabbed her husband's face as Rachel began rubbing her dad's back and said, "Hey. Hey. James, take a deep breath and look at me, come on."

James calmed his breathing and focused back on his wife, tears still streaming down his face. Sarah gripped his face a little tighter and gave it a few tugs as she said her next words. "James you know why you can't stay here. You made a promise to me and vows to me and the gods that if I ever died before you that you would keep on living. You remember those promises that you made to me? And that you made to our daughter for that matter."

James let out a little sniffle as he replied, "Of course I do my northern starlight."

Sarah narrowed her eyes a little as she gave his facial fur a tug and said, "then why are you trying to kill yourself you stubborn fox!?"

James let out a little scoff as he said "Because you're here! Because Rachel is here! You're my life mate! Rachel is my kit! And I lost both of you! I have nothing to live for back there! Nothing!"

Sarah let out a little growl at his stubbornness and replied, "yes you do! What about your mother huh!? Your little brother! They would never know what happened to you and they need you in their lives! They're your family too!"

James let out a little whine as he replied "I know they are! But I don't care about them! I care about you and our daughter!"

Sarah closed her eyes for a moment in frustration. _"Ugh I forgot how much of a stubborn fox I married. I need to get through to him, I KNOW how much he wants to stay here with us."_

Sarah was trying to think of something that would get through to her mate when their daughter spoke up. "But daddy if you really care about me and mommy, you would keep your promises! And you made unbreakable vows! Vows that the gods saw! Breaking them would make them really mad! And it would make mommy and I sad! You don't wanna make us sad do you?"

That got through to James. James brought his daughter from his side to her mothers so he could look at them both as he said, "no sweetie of course I don't want to make you and mommy sad, I would never dream of it!"

Sarah caressed her fox's face as she said, "then you can't stay."

Jameson's whole body sagged in defeat and he murmured, "but I don't know if I can move on, I don't know if I can keep on going without you two."

Sarah gave him a small smile as she replied, "but I do, you are gonna keep on moving and living because you are so very strong. And because you know we'll be watching you and will be with you every step of the way from here ...also if you don't I'll find some way to come down from heaven to kick your furry butt!"

Jameson couldn't help but laugh at that last part. But, it was a short one as as he sighed and said, "You know I'll never move on from you right? I can't Sarah, I physically and mentally can't. I imprinted on you, I marked you, I chose YOU as my life mate. I only get one and I chose YOU! It's impossible for me to find another, and even if I could, I wouldn't want to."

Sarah couldn't help but coo at James statement of love and commitment to her. It intensified tenfold when her mate shifted his gaze to their daughter and said "and you my little starlight are also irreplaceable. You are MY daughter, my first kit. I may be able to adopt another kit, another little girl but she will never be able to replace you my little starlight."

Jameson's heartfelt words caused both his does to embrace and he relished holding both of his starlights again. After a few minutes they separated and Sarah gently said, "while I find your commitment to me adorable and heart warming. Part of those promises you made to me was that you would move on and find another, so you wouldn't live out the rest of your life alone."

James shook his head a little and evenly replied "Sarah, I would love more than anything to not die alone, but you're up here and as I told you. You are my one and only love, there can't be another."

Sarah gave him a sly smile as she said, "but isn't possible for foxes to imprint and another mammal?"

James scoffed a little at that and said "sure on the incredibly rare occasion that can occur. Buts it's like a 0.00001% chance of happening Sarah! But it won't happen to me. I won't let it happen to me! I chose YOU! I don't want anyone else!"

Sarah once again had to coo at James firm words of commitment to her as it made her heart flutter. But regardless she still replied, "but I thought fox tods such as yourself have no control over who you imprint on."

James mouth was left agape at the statement to which Sarah gave a triumphant smirk and said "yeah, forgot I knew about that huh my stubborn fox. James you promised me you will find someone and move on, you also made a vow to Serendipity and Fertility that you would find someone and move on. They heard you, you know."

James raised an eyebrow at the last part, this wasn't the first time the gods had been brought up. Their daughter had been the first to bring them up, that they saw the vows he made and breaking the, would make the gods angry. He wanted to question that then in there, but he had more pressing matters at that particular moment. But now this was the second time they had been brought up, so now he had to ask.

"Sarah what are you talking about? What's the gods got to do with this? They keep coming up while we've been speaking and I don't see how they have to do with any of this."

James unlike his mate wasn't much of a religious fox. He wasn't even sure they gods really existed and if they did, they sure as hell didn't do much. The whole world was in chaos and with the life he's lived, especially growing up ...he found it hard to believe they were real or if they were they definitely didn't give a damn.

Sarah gave her fox a small look of surprise before remembering that he wasn't very big on religion and the gods. She honestly couldn't blame his views either, but regardless they were the reason this whole conversation was even happening. So she told him as much.

"James my love they are the whole reason we're having this conversation in the first place. Well two of them specifically."

It was James turn to give her a look of shock. Sarah smirked at him a little and she was about to continue, but their daughter beat her to it. "Yes daddy!, they're real! All of them! All of them! We even met a couple!"

James eyes looked like they could pop out his skull as he looked back and forth between his two does. It took a minute but he finally managed to get out a question, "Which ones?"

Rachel shot her paws into the air as she yelled "Anubis and Karma! They were really nice! Though Karma was a little scary!"

James jaw dropped as he shifted his gaze to his wife. Sarah couldn't help but laugh at his expression, once it was over she said "Rachel could you go back to the swing? Me and your daddy have to go over some adult things."

Rachel stood as she said "okay mommy." She gave James a quick hug before dashing over to the swing and hopping on, going back to swinging. James and Sarah just watched their daughter swing and James murmured, "It's like nothing changed for her."

Sarah smiled as she said, "I thought that too. Anubis told me it's with all children that die. They are granted understanding of their death when their soul is collected without their knowing. That way nothing changes for them and they retain that innocence and happiness."

James glanced at his mate and said, "so they really are real huh? Funny that they give a damn about me now as you say they do. They sure as shit haven't done anything for me before…but let's not get into that, I'm sure I'll have an opportunity to get an answer from them soon enough…I doubt this place has a door for me to walk through so I deduce one of them is going to appear and send me back. *sighs* So you actually spoke with the real Anubis? All the books say you're met with an apparition of him as he can't collect every soul and lead them to the valley of judgement."

Sarah nodded a few times and replied, "most of the time yes, when you die your soul is collected by an apparition of Anubis, who then leads you to a holy point that then opens a gateway to the valley of judgement. But what you my fox didn't know if there are occasions were Anubis himself is there to greet your soul and lead you on the path to the valley of judgement. Well he made an appearance for me and Rachel, he introduced himself, said hello to Rachel, then spoke to me some before leading us towards the nearest portal. As we walked he asked a few questions but other than that stayed quiet. One question he did answer is why he himself came to collect us. He very simply said 'because someone asked me too'."

James nodded once as he kept watching his daughter swing. "So I'm guessing when you stepped through the portal into the valley of judgement, Karma was waiting there to greet you."

Sarah took a moment to shift into a sitting position, tucking her legs to her left and leaning into her mate before going, "mhmm."

James also shifted to a sitting position, kicking his legs out in front of him but keeping his left knee raised. He wrapped his left arm and tail around his mate and looked down at her saying, "comfy?"

Sarah simply snuggled into him more and hugging his tail and then said, "You bet. So fluffffyyy. So as I was going to say before I decided to take my tail back (James chuckles at that). Was that yes Karma waiting there to greet us and he's exactly as he's depicted, a feral red fox in every way..wasn't even wearing clothes"

Sarah began laughing at that moment, her whole body shaking. James gave her a puzzled look and had to ask, "what's so funny?"

Sarah took a few deep breaths from her laughing fit and then managed to gasp out, "it's just that there's so many mammals that are so prejudiced against foxes and such ...the look on their faces they must have when they see the god of judgment is a fox!"

James snorted once before joint his wife laughing about the pure irony of that. It took a minute for both of them to get their laughter under control but once they did, and wiped a view tears away from laughing so much they got back to the topic at hand. "So my love you were saying?"

"Yes, Karma. The second we stepped through the portal he was there. He padded over to us on all fours and once to us sat down and introduced himself, saying hello to Rachel first and speaking with her. His voice was warm and commanding as he spoke, though he kept it light and gentle when speaking to Rachel. He told a few jokes that made her laugh, answered some questions she had about him, then he made a swing appear on the tree and pointed to it with an outstretched paw asking if she wanted to go swing. Rachel hugged him, which surprised him greatly before she ran off to the swing."

James chuckled a little at that. "Of course only our daughter could surprise a god with a hug. I swear anyone could take her, they'd just have to say there was a swing where they were going."

Sarah snorted at that. "True. But the swing served a purpose because of course there were some things he needed to speak to me about. He started by saying he was the one that asked Anubis to personally collect us and then he told me why. He explained that vows, prayers, and anything else made in holy places like the temple we were in is indeed heard by the gods. More specifically angels under them which the angels can then decide whether or not to bring to their attention. So, the vow you made in the temple in front of the statue of Fertility and Serendipity was heard…and an angel decided to bring it to Serendipity's attention."

Now James was confused again. "Why would my vow be of any interest to Serendipity?"

Sarah nodded and replied, "I asked Karma the same thing. He let out a chuckle and then very simply said 'because Seren and I are lovers and mates….I suppose you could even say we are husband and wife.'"

James jaw dropped. "So you're telling me, Karma feral Fox God of judgment is mated with Serendipity rabbit god of chance?"

Sarah nodded once. "Yep, a fox God and a bunny god are married to each other. To bad that part got missed in the sacred texts."

James picked his jaw up off the ground and replied, "no kidding. Then we wouldn't have had to keep our relationship hidden, a lot of mammals wouldn't have to."

Sarah snuggled into her mate more and said, "mhmm. Now back to the topic at hand. So when you a fox made a vow for love to a bunny in the view of the gods it was of great to Serendipity. So much so that she told Karma and they both started to keep tabs on us…so when me and Rachel were killed…they had to do something. Karma called what had happened a 'gross injustice,' and he was angered over it. But he mentioned it was nothing compared to how his mate felt. Karma said his Seren was furious about what happened to us and how it affected you and wanted to rain down hellfire. Karma had to talk her down, she settled when he told her those mammals that killed us weren't even sent through the valley of justice he called in a favor and they were sent straight down to the bowels of hell."

James let out a satisfied huff at that. "good."

Sarah gave a little laugh at that and then continued. "Yes, I thought so too. So after he said he sent them straight to the bowels of hell he began to explain how insistent his mate was on helping us, but since we were dead…that only left you. So Karma said Serendipity wanted to assure that the vow you made would come to pass…all of it and that she would arrange it so I wouldn't have to worry about you. With that assurance made he then opened a portal straight to heaven. I of course asked why didn't we have to walk through the valley of judgement ...and he said 'Me and my Seren have been watching you since the day you had your mate take that vow. So my judgement has already been passed. You and your daughter are more than worthy to join the heavens ...I'd also wager one or both of you even growing a set of wings and becoming angels.'"

James smiled warmly at that part, imagining his two does becoming angels. His Northern Starlight would probably become an angel for Serendipity and his little starlight would become an angel for children. Sarah allowed him that small moment before continuing.

"But of course a certain someone was being a stubborn fox marching to his own death so Karma came to visit us and he brought his wife with him. She was going to become my boss after all..They talked to us for a few hours before bringing your troublesome butt up. Once they did though you quickly became the focus, we quickly devised a plan to get you to snap out of it. It involved Serendipity manipulating chance so Johnathan could find your hat, setting a chain reaction in motion. Followed by Karma arranging this reunion so I could knock some sense into the very stubborn fox I married."

To insinuate her point she smacked her fox upside the head causing him to go, "Ow hey! You've already snapped me out of it! Gonna be like that you lose your tail touching privileges!"

James began to stand and playfully took his tail back, making sure to swipe her on the nose with it as he did. We happened next was an impromptu game of predator chase prey (cat and mouse) except in this case Sarah was the predator. It only took a minute for their daughter to join in as well in chasing James around heir laughter echoing through the plane. The game ended when James let both of his does tackle him to the ground in a fit of laughter.

They tussled on the ground for a bit before James conceded defeat, his two does high fiving each other at their victory over him. His daughter jumped off of him though to chase a butterfly that had just appeared and fluttered by Sarah calling out as she did "Don't stray too far chasing it Rachel! We need to get going soon!"

Rachel yelled out "okay!" As she chased after it, luckily it seemed to be going in a circle around the hill so she'd stay close. Of course it could be because Karma was sitting in the tree, perched on the beach the swing was tied too. He had come to send James back and collect the two does, appearing just as the chase got started. He sat there amused as he watched it happen, waiting for it to be down so he could reveal himself. But, seeing the two mates together and seeming to have more to say he decided to keep the little one distracted and let them finish their talk.

Sarah and James laid there, their laughter slowly dying down and when it did they locked eyes and Sarah ensnared him in a deep and passionate kiss.


End file.
